Tuesday, July 19, 2011

dating do or don't: dating in the 21st century


I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, dating in today’s day and age is the most complicated, confusing thing. No other generation has had to deal with all the forms of communication we have—in fact, when my parents were dating, they had one phone line for the entire floor in their dorms {unheard of!}. Today, we have our cell phones (texting and calls), Facebook, Twitter, email, etc. And it seems not all of us know how to properly communicate with all of these tools. Here are a few of my guidelines for dating in these technological times:

  • Do be timely. If you’re going to add someone on Facebook and/or Twitter, do it right after you’ve met them. If you got someone’s number and you want to text them or call them, wait a day or two. But don’t call me after it’s been a week and expect me to still be interested, to me that means you aren’t that interested in me to begin with.
  • Don’t over-communicate. Leave some conversation for your first date or whenever you will see each other next. Hint: Holding onto a little mystery keeps me interested.
  • Don’t be afraid to take the next step. There is a time and a place for introducing yourself to someone on the Internet, or via telephone. But if you ever want a chance at a sustainable relationship, we’re going to have to see each other in real life.
  • Don’t over-share. I can spot an over-sharer from a mile away and nothing turns me off more. I don’t want to hear about every mundane detail of your life. Just saying.
  • Do be sober. I am definitely guilty of not following this little rule, so I can tell you from experience it's not a good idea. Drinking and texting never leads to anything good. Save yourself the embarrassment and trust me on this one.
  • Do creep. I’m sorry, but one advantage of living in the 21st century is that I get to see your ex-girlfriend’s picture on Facebook. Everyone does it. Don’t be ashamed. But please don’t hold any incriminating pictures you may find against me.
  • Don’t send x-rated pictures. Okay, do it. But if they end up on the Internet forever, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
  • Do your research. If you’re going on a date with someone, check out their Facebook profile to find out what they’re interested in. Easy conversation starters—just maybe don’t mention that you stalked them on the web. For example, you saw some pictures of a family trip to Italy. Date convo: “Have you ever traveled to Europe? Oh, Italy? Awesome! Tell me about it…”
  • Don’t badmouth your ex on the Internet. I’m not impressed that you’re saying mean things about them. Because more than likely, I’ll be next.

And finally….

  • Do not troll the Internet for dates, people. I cannot be held responsible for your impending abduction. Be responsible, the Internet is a scary place.

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